Laughs With Andrew

We were looking at our boxes of random things, and I pulled out my baby book that my mom compiled for me when I was young. The cover is one my mom sewed for me. I loved cats a LOT at the time, and so my mom had selected a fabric COVERED with cats, lined with a pink frilly ribbon around the edges.

"As you can see, I loved cats..." I told Andrew.

The reaction was immediate. Andrew began singing.

"I love cats, I love every kind of cat! I just want to hug all of them, but I can't! Can't hug every cat."

Well, he got the reaction he was looking for: I was laughing.

For those of you that are confused by this, I will share the origin of this outburst. If you decide to watch this, I will not blame you if you don't want to watch the video after it, which is where the song originated from. Here's the song:

This is the song someone parodied off of this - I'm pretty sure when I first saw these, I was POSITIVE these HAD to be fake. She must have been acting or SOMETHING. But to me, this dating video screams, "GUYS, unless you love cats and want to be buried alive in them, RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!"

Another Blog!

I've been debating about starting another blog for a while now (I know, I know... I already have more than one... But this one is different). Well, the debating is over. I went ahead and started my other blog.

The blog I just started is entitled "Bread of Life: A Testament of The Living Christ" - In case the title doesn't make the purpose clear, this blog will focus entirely on gospel topics & so on. I've posted a couple of times on different gospel topics (like Angels Among Us, Adversity, etc) but this blog would be a place where I can focus on church topics entirely. In it I hope to learn and grow and increase my own testimony of the gospel while simultaneously having the opportunity to share the gospel (I hope!) and also, hopefully, answer others' (and my own) prayers.

While I haven't really advertised my other blogs much, I hope to be better about advertising this one so that it reaches more people and will hopefully find those that need it the most.

I will be using, as sources, scriptures, general conference talks, and quotes from church leaders, as well as my own testimony and personal experiences, so that what I teach will be in line with the gospel.

Anyway, here's the link! Please check it out, give feedback, and follow! :
http://bearing-testimony.blogspot.com/

"Amen! (An Interrupted Prayer)" by Ted Gibbons

 “Amen! (An Interrupted Prayer)” by Ted Gibbons

“My dear Father in Heaven . . .

                Yes?

Could we have a little quiet around here? I’m praying.

                But you called me.

Called who? I didn’t call anybody. I’m praying. My Dear Father in Heaven . . .

                There. You did it again.

Did what?

                Called me. You said, “My dear Father in Heaven.”
                Here I am. What’s on your mind?

But I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just, you know, saying my prayers for the night. I always say my prayers. I don’t feel good about going to sleep if I don’t.

                Oh. All right. Go on.

Are you kidding?

                You did want to talk to me, didn’t you?

Well . . . yes.

                Here I am. Talk.

I’m thankful for my many blessings . . .

                Excuse me again! How thankful?

What?

                How thankful are you for your ‘many blessings’?

I’m . . . well . . . I don’t know. It’s just a part of the prayer. Mom always told me I should always express my thanks when I pray.

                Oh. Well . . . you’re certainly welcome. Go ahead.

Go ahead?

                With the prayer.

Oh. Yeah. Let’s see . . . bless the poor and the downtrodden, the unfortunate and the afflicted . . .

                Do you really mean that?

Sure I mean it.

                What are you doing about it?

Doing? What am I doing about it? Well . . . I’m praying about it. I just think that it would be nice if you got control of things down here. I don’t like to see people suffer.

                Do I have control over you?

Sure. I go to church. I make donations sometimes. I even read the scriptures once in a while. I don’t . . .

That isn’t what I asked you. What about your temper? You don’t even have control of that, and your friends and family suffer. And then there’s the way you spend your money. And how about the kind of books you read? And the movies you see?

Well, Father, I think I’m as good as most of the people I see every Sunday at church.

And you are, but I thought you were praying for me to bless the afflicted. If that is going to happen, I’ll have to have help from the ones who are praying for it. Like you.

I understand. I guess I have a few hangups. Since you brought it up, I could probably mention some others.

                So could I. Should we visit about them?

Oh . . . Let me get back to you on that. I need to finish up here. This is taking a lot longer than usual. Bless the honest in heart to come to thy Son and receive His blessings.

                You mean people like Ralph?

Ralph?

Yes. The one you’ve taught your little brother, Joey, to call ‘Beer-belly Ralph.’ The man around the corner.

That Ralph? Ralph Swenson? You’ve got to be kidding. He hasn’t been sober since he was sixteen. And he hates organized religion.

                Why?

I don’t know.

                It couldn’t have anything to do with the names the neighborhood kids call him, could it?

OK. I get the message. I’ll tell Joey to cut it out.

                By the way, have you had a look at his heart lately?

His heart?

                I have. I’ve looked. And it’s one of those honest hearts you were just praying about.

Well, then, do something about it. Do you think I like having an atheist for a neighbor?

                Aren’t you supposed to share the gospel? I thought I’d made that pretty clear.

That’s scary. I wouldn’t have any idea how to approach him.

Try a little tolerance and friendship. Try a little service. If you get desperate, try asking me for help.

Father, wait a minute. I know I’m not perfect. But I am here, doing my duty, keeping your commandment to pray, and all of a sudden, you’re here, reminding me of all my problems.

Child, you called me. Remember? Keep on praying. I’m interested in the next part. You haven’t changed the order around, have you?

I don’t want to go on.

                Why not?

I know what you’ll say.

                Try me and see.

Please forgive me of all my sins, and help me to forgive others.

                What about David?

See! I knew it! I knew you’d bring him up. Listen, Lord. He told lies about me and I lost my job – the best job I ever had. Everyone in that office thinks I crawled out from under a rock, and I didn’t do anything except choose other friends! Am I supposed to let him get away with that?

                But your prayers. What about your prayers?

I didn’t mean that part about forgiving.

                Well, at least you’re honest. I guess you enjoy carrying that load of bitterness around, don’t you?

No, I don’t. But I’ll feel better as soon as I get even.

                Do you want to know a secret?

What secret?

                You won’t feel better. You’ll feel worse. Listen to me. You forgive David, and I’ll forgive you.

Forgive me? For what?

                For what? How much time do you have?

All right. Never mind. But, Lord . . . I don’t think I can forgive David.

                Then I can’t forgive you.

Why not?

                Because I hate to encourage hypocrisy.

Oh. All right. Please help me to control my actions and not yield to temptation.

Good. I’ll do just that. But you stop putting yourself in all those places where you can be tempted.

What do you mean by that?

Quit hanging around the magazine racks and spending so much time in front of the tube. That stuff is going to get to you sooner or later and you’ll find yourself involved in something terrible. When you do, don’t expect me to rescue you, either.

Rescue me? I don’t understand.

Think about it. You’ve done it lots of times. You put very little effort into our relationship until you find yourself in a crisis; then you come running. I know just how your dad feels.

My dad?

Your dad. The only time you talk to him is when you need something. As a matter of fact, it’s amazing how quickly the intensity of your prayers improves when you are in trouble. Do you remember some of those bargains you wanted to make with me?

Bargains? No . . . well, I don’t think . . . Oh yeah, like thet time I went to that show and met Mom’s friend on the street when I came out . . . Oh, brother!

Do you remember your prayer? I do. You said, “Oh, God, don’t let her tell my mother where I’ve been. I promise I’ll go to nothing but ‘G’-rated movies from now on.” She didn’t tell your mother, but you didn’t keep your promise, did you?

No, Father, I didn’t. I’m sorry.

                So am I. Go on and finish your prayer.

No, wait. I want to ask you a question. Do you always listen to my prayers?

                Every word. Every time.

Why haven’t you ever answered me before?

How many chances have you given me? There’s not enough time between your “Amen” and your head hitting the pillow for me to take a breath. How am I supposed to give you an answer?

You could, if you really wanted to.

                No, I could if you really wanted me to. Child, I always want to.

Father, I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?

I already have. And thanks for letting me interrupt. I get lonely to talk to you sometimes. Good night. I love you.

Good night. And I love you, too.”

A Few Random Facts About Andrew

• His favorite color is emerald, which is also his birthstone.

• He's an even bigger bookworm than I am. (I didn't think this was possible...) 
• His favorite genre is Science Fiction, and his favorite Sci-Fi author is David Weber. 

• He likes chick flicks, like Pride and Prejudice and Ever After. 
• His favorite movie, though, is How to Train Your Dragon.

• He knows how to crochet; his grandmother taught him, I believe. 

• He took a clogging class when he was young, and often when we're dancing will do foot work he learned from clogging to a dance, mixed with steps from ballroom.

• He loves telling jokes and can come up with one for pretty much every topic.

• He's extremely punny and loves puns. 
• All of his Halloween costumes have been pun related. (We taped matches on our shirts and were "Matching" - he wore a suit and I wore a formal dress, and we dressed up as "dressed up" - he wore bike tires around his shirt and went as "tired").
• He also bought a kite once with a flying pig on it just so he could get pigs to fly... The kite broke.

• His favorite flower is the dandelion.
•  He loves how sunshine-y and yellow they are, and how hardy they are.

• He loves Mexican food, and his favorite drink is a purple corn drink he had on his mission in Florida.

• His main love languages are Communication, Quality Time, and Touch.

• He has a really good voice (especially when he's singing Hymns, I think.) 
• He enjoys singing falsetto (maybe because it makes me laugh?) and can sing Taylor Swift songs in the correct octave.

• He loves hiking and camping and the outdoors.

• He's a really fast learner, and is amazing at math.

• He doesn't like writing all that much, because he misspells words often. He hates the red line that goes underneath of words if you misspell them, and rather than try to spell things correctly he'll just figure out a way to reword it. Because of this, he's not the biggest fan of English classes.

• He loves dancing. A lot. He's been on the bronze and silver ballroom teams at UVU, and they offered him a position on the gold team, which he didn't take.

• As a little boy, if he ever went missing, his hiding place was underneath of two lilac bushes in his front yard.

• He claims that he doesn't really cook, but he makes AMAZING spaghetti sauce.

• He is a huge fan of pickles, olives, and banana peppers. 

What Love Is Built On

"True Love" comes in many shapes, sizes, forms, and colors.

Mine came in a way quite different than I had ever had in mind. My relationship is not entirely how I had imagined love and marriage would be. But now that I try looking back, I'm not entirely sure what I had been expecting.
Roses and chocolates? Love letters? Bold declarations to the world of his love for me?

My love didn't come in quite that form. My love was built on things I thought I had left behind in childhood, as well as many other things that I love and enjoy now. My love encompasses areas of all stages of my lifetime thus far.

So what is my love built on?

Dancing.

Andrew and I met at a Stake Dance we were both crashing.
I don't think Heavenly Father left much of that meeting up to chance; He definitely had a hand in it.
But that's another story.
I knew ballroom, but the only other guy there that I knew knew how to dance was Tom, Andrew's younger brother.
Tom was on a date, but he was kind enough to dance one dance with me when I asked him to.
That was enough for Andrew to notice that I knew ballroom and help him decide that he needed to ask me to dance.
We ended up dancing almost every single dance together that night.

(Also, a random side note: Andrew is the first guy EVER to ask me to interpretive dance to a slow dance with him.)

That was the first time we have danced together, but definitely not the last. Dancing will be a part of our relationship pretty much always.

Hiking.

This was our first date.
Look at the far right top corner. See that series of tiny little lines? That is a ledge.
Andrew convinced me, without much effort, to go along that with him to get a really good view of the waterfall.
I'm not entirely sure how/why I already trusted him enough to follow him on that.
Especially since falling is my greatest fear.

The top of this waterfall is where Andrew proposed to me on August 9th, 2011.

Coloring In Coloring Books.

You can go back and read that again if you have to. Because you read correctly.
When he asked me on this date, I was beyond excited.
For real.

Forts.

We made one on a date.
And watched movies.
He chose Pride and Prejudice (Turns out he likes chick flicks - yes, you read that right, too).
I chose Tangled (He agrees with Flynn Ryder; he's always had a thing for brunettes.)

Thumb Wars.

This would be one of the things I was never expecting to find in love.
Neither was he.
Even though he started it.
He accepts all blame and responsibility for starting these.
I don't think he cares, because he seems to enjoy them.
So do I :)

Poking Fights Turned Tickle Fights.

He cheats. He spins me around and holds me like this so that I can't retaliate.
Once again, something he started.
He accepts full blame for this as well.

Falsetto Singing.

             I don't really have a picture of this. But he does it. A lot. He sings Taylor Swift in the right octave.

Jokes.

He likes telling jokes.
A lot.
Say ANYTHING, and it will remind him either of a story or a joke.
Probably a joke.

Pokemon Battling.

This is probably the biggest nerd confession I have ever made.
I thought I was done with these in Elementary School.
Apparently not.

. . .  Don't judge me.

Some things are the same as I had pictured. Others? Definitely not so much.
My favorites are the the small things.

The look he gets in his eyes when he looks at me.
When he spins me around in circles.
When he calls me beautiful even when I don't feel beautiful at all.
When he rolls up his sleeves and starts on the dishes.
When he bows his head and offers the prayer.
When he helps his younger sister learn how to dance.
When he helps his younger sister with her math homework.
When he helps his mom make dinner.
When he laughs and jokes with James, and I see them getting along so well.

This only scratches the surface.

I'm so happy for the shape, size, form, and color my true love came in :)

I love you, Andrew!!

Compromising

"We're not going tomorrow," I insisted yet again, stubborn.

Andrew had changed the topic for a while, only to bring it up again. "I can even walk without a limp," he insisted.

"You were limping this morning. Are you sure that you're not not limping simply because you're being stubborn and forcing yourself to walk normally so that we can go?"
" . . . That may have something to do with it," Andrew admitted, smiling at me with wide eyes, trying to pull an innocent expression to win me over. That or it could have been an attempt at giving me pleading "puppy eyes". I decided to try to ignore his expression.

"Another thing with not going," I added, giving Andrew an alternate solution so that he would be okay with not going this time, "is there's a dinner date dance night with the Orem Institute in November."
"Great!" Andrew said cheerily. "We can go to that, too!"

I shook my head, amused at his dogged determination.

"I'll even dress up. I can wear a cape and slick my hair back and go as a vampire. The kind without glitter," he continued. "I won't even need any kind of makeup, since I'm white enough already." I smiled, resting my head on his shoulder, not responding. I pulled away again, looking him in the eyes. His expression was still there. I turned away, trying not to let myself get worn over.

"You know you want to," Andrew pressed.. Leaning back against him as he wrapped his arms around me, I sighed.

"Ok, maybe a little."
"HA! See? I was right! I win! Even if only half of you wants to, ALL of me does, and that makes it 3/4 against 1/4, and majority wins!" He was grinning, triumphant.

Struggling internally, I turned to him. "You'll stop if your foot starts hurting too badly?"
"I may be a little stupid, but I'm not an idiot."
"Okay, we can go."

We're going dancing tomorrow night.

Normally Andrew doesn't have to try pressing at me to go dancing with him. I honestly love dancing with him. This time it was different though.

We had gone to classic skating a couple days ago and he had broken open a blister on his foot that neither of us knew existed. Consequentially, his foot was hurting him a lot.
However, I'm marrying someone that absolutely loves ballroom and loves going dancing. How could he pass that up?

First conversational debate results?
Both of us were silently stubborn.

Him stubbornly wanting to take me dancing, me not wanting him to hurt his foot worse.

After conversing for a while, we compromised.

Marriage is certainly going to be interesting.

Especially when we reach issues difficult to compromise over.

Finding the Sunshine

I've often joked that optimism is just in my blood; after all, my blood type is B+. Occasionally things will come along that will bring me down, but it usually doesn't take long for me to bounce back up.

Thank you everyone for your support and well wishes the other day. They helped, and once again life is doing much better. My mom made a comment on my last post, saying "today is inherently going to be better - because you'll find the sunshine - you always do. :)"

I did find sunshine. These were some of my sunshines:

My car is up and running again!! I'm seriously so happy that it passed safety and emissions and I was able to register it again. Now we just have to get my fiance's car fixed...

Did you know that true love came complete with tickle fights, thumb wars, ballroom dancing, jokes, academic conversations, shameless flirting and compliments, glidging, Lincoln Logs, Pokemon battles, hiking, and more? (He even helps with dishes when I get behind on them! Which happens a lot...) I absolutely had no clue what it was going to be like falling in love with this man, or what I was getting myself into. Love is different than how I had pictured it, and definitely for the better.

The temple is reserved, plans are falling into place, and the date is getting closer and closer. I'm marrying the love of my life and I couldn't be happier! Now, if only weddings would plan themselves...

The literal sunshine. It's been so warm and sunny lately that you almost can't help but feel happy inside. It makes me want to dance and sing and run and play and just ENJOY living! So I do :)

 
 My beautiful, beautiful, amazing little sister :) She came down to visit for the weekend and spending time with her and feeling her love was SPLENDID! I wish I could have spent more of that time with her, but I'm so grateful for the time I got.

There are so many more. Friends that have helped, family, and the many, many small pleasures that life offers. I'm grateful for a fiance that truly loves and cares about me, that has stood beside me every step of the way (since I met him), for both his and my family for their love and support, and for my friends that have never given up on me. I'm grateful for laughter, thumb wars, tickle fights, and smoothies. I cannot count the innumerable things the Savior has blessed me with.

Here's to looking for the sunshine! 

Just One of Those Days

You know those days where everything starts out pretty great, then something just goes wrong? Today was just one of those days.

Today started off as one of the kinds of days where you actually get stuff done. Like, bake a cake. Or make a giant cookie the size of a large pizza and frost it red (or more of a pink if you can't make it red enough) and cover with candy so it also looks like a large pizza. Or hang out with a friend. Or battle with Pokemon cards with your older brother and that friend. Or contact a seamstress to get your dress altered for a wedding. Or get some laundry done.

Or, if you're me, all of the above.

My day really was going exceptionally well. I was leaving with my friend, Carlin, to go drop off my giant pizza cookie at work, then take my dress to the seamstress I had called and contacted, and then possibly find time to donate plasma before heading off to work that night. I made it to Domino's and dropped off the pizza cookie and went back out to the car. And tried to start the car.

And then I tried to start the car again.
And again.
And again.

You know, it had driven there fine. It had given no signs of any issues before. But now it would NOT start. Two of my coworkers came and stopped and looked at the car. We tried getting a rolling start to get it to turn over and start. We tried SEVERAL ideas. NOTHING worked. I was also having a very hard time getting someone to cover my shift. I had to call and cancel my appointment to stop by the seamstress' house to drop off the dress and get the alterations done as soon as possible.

Honestly, I was ready to cry. I was so stressed out that it was ridiculous. My manager Ashlie was pretty much ready to let me use her car to close, but she wasn't sure she actually could let one of the drivers use her car since she was manager. I finally managed to find someone to close for me, though, and I went back to my car. Carlin tried contacting a friend to get suggestions on how to get it to start, but nothing worked. We walked across the street to the library, came back, and then finally got a ride from Carlin's grandmother. She dropped me off at my house and I headed to bed.

So, crying is definitely the worst invention ever. Honestly? Apparently feeling upset enough to cry isn't enough, because then you also get a headache, congestion, and your eyes get all red and puffy. End result, you look as bad as you feel. Which, if you encounter a mirror after crying, only makes you feel worse. Someone seriously needs to revise this invention. All it does is makes you go from feeling horrible to making you feel worse. It does help relieve stress, though. Somehow.

When Andrew got on his break from work he then got all of the texts I had sent him. He handled it really well, assuring me he didn't think it was my fault, we'd figure it out, and that he'd stop by after work. Honestly, reacting the way he did just helped reaffirm my belief that I'm choosing a great guy to marry. I'm so grateful for him.

Hopefully soon we can get everything figured out with his car. At least tomorrow is my day off...

And hopefully tomorrow isn't just one of those days.

Change

It seems like the only consistency to life is change. It's almost like God's way of making sure we have to rely on Him and forcing us to trust that He has greater plans in store for us. Sometimes understanding why things are happening the way they are is completely beyond us. We just can't see why things are the way they are while we're in the moment of things.

I guess where I'm going with this is how huge the changes in my family's lives have been. While not all of the changes have not been bad, change is still something that throws us off by a lot.

My parents are now divorced.
My mom moved to South Weber has started attending college at Weber State University (and is getting straight A's! I'm so proud of her!! She's extremely stressed out all the time now, though) and is trying to get into a competitive nursing program.
My older brother is shipping out to the Marines in a week.
I'm getting married in 9 weeks, and I'm going to be going through the temple to get my endowments in 7 weeks. Definitely not a bad change, but I'm not going to lie. It's slightly scary since I have no idea what to expect. It's also very exciting though :)
My younger siblings have all moved to South Weber with my mom. This means they had to leave all of their friends here, since they now live 2 - 2 1/2 hours away. They're not going to the same schools anymore, have to make new friends, and my younger sister is learning how to drive... Their whole lives have just gone topsy turvy.

I'm not going to lie and say that I'm 100% comfortable with all of the changes in my life. I honestly feel like one of the only stable aspects of my life that I can rely on without doubt is my fiance.

However, with all the changes going on in my family's lives, I can go back to the words of Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin, "Come What May and Love It."

The Pain is Fading

Pioneers Day has been a painful holiday for me for the past few years. On July 24, 2009 my father went to jail for hurting my mom. The memory of that day has always been a really sharp, painful, vivid memory that I couldn't shake. However, this year on Pioneers Day, as I was telling my boyfriend (now fiance) about the experience I had, I noticed that the pain wasn't as sharp as I recalled all of the details of that day. I didn't withdraw inside myself to hide from the pain, I didn't cry, I didn't feel furious at my father... I was simply revisiting a part of my past that has made me into who I am today. It was a sad memory to be sure. But it was no longer a living nightmare that I am trying to escape from.

This gives me so much hope for the future, for moving on, for forgiving, and for becoming so much more whole. I know that I am healing and that I am heading in the right direction.

I'm so grateful for the Atonement and for my friends that have helped me get to this point. Without them, I don't think I would be as far along in this process as I already am.

I'm going to continue healing. Someday I will completely forgive and move on.

For this I am grateful.

Photographic Memories

The Bishop from my first YSA ward, Bishop Newman.

My fiance and I :) I love him so much!!

My beautiful four little sisters :)

Rebecca took my place in the food chain. She's the happy smiling one about to be eaten alive.

I Said Yes!!

On Tuesday, August 9th, 2011, Andrew Christiansen asked me to marry him. And I said yes!

The ring!

Here's how he asked:
We frequently go on hikes together (Dry Canyon, Battle Creek Canyon, Provo Canyon, The Y, Stewart Falls...), so him asking me if I wanted to go on a hike with him was nothing out of the ordinary. We took a longer route getting to the canyon than normal, but started off the hike as normal. See, when we hike, we try to find the colors of the rainbow along the trail. It can't be something you brought with you or that you are wearing. And the sky does not count, because it's not exactly ON the trail. There were a trillion (definition: a large undetermined number) caterpillars in silky webs on the way up, and yellow was definitely well represented that day.

We finally made it to the top of the waterfall. For a second I thought we were going to cross and go across the ledge we had gone across on our first date, but since the water was unusually high it's probably a good thing we didn't cross to the other side so we could go on to the lookout area. However, there at the bank of the water was a vase of flowers and a small cooler that had a note attached to it with heart stickers that said, "For a couple of great people!"

The vase of flowers at the top of the waterfall.
Pictures taken by Andrew's brother, Tom, who had brought them up beforehand.

Andrew got down to where they were laying, then turned to me and knelt on one knee. "Elizabeth (he used my full name), will you marry me?"
I'm not sure if my yes was actually audible, but apparently it worked, because he put the ring on my finger and then kissed me. I then picked up the vase of flowers and carefully made my way back down to the bottom of the falls, Andrew carrying the small cooler beside me. We had lunch at the bottom of the falls, with mist spraying lightly on us. It was amazing :)

Halfway through eating, a lady approached us. "Hey!" she greeted us warmly. " So, what are you two up to?"
"He asked me to marry him," I told her, smiling, and showed her my ring.
"Oh my goodness, that is gorgeous!" she said, smiling widely. "We were kind of guessing that's what happened. Well, congratulations!"
"Thank you!" we both said as she left, the group of children that had been with her leaving as well.

My gorgeous ring ;)

After we finished, we sat and enjoyed the breeze and each others company for a while before heading back to the car slowly. Along the way, another group, with a bunch of scouts, two women, and two little girls stopped us. "We just saw you walking down with the flowers and everything, and my daughter just said that it was romantic," the woman told us, smiling. "Is there any special occasion?"
"Actually..." I paused, then held out my hand for her to see, leaving the meaning clear.
"Oh my goodness!! That's fantastic! (Her daughter's name), come look at this!! He just asked her to marry him!"
The little girl looked at my ring shyly, then went back to the group.
"I should have figured. You two are just glowing! Well, congratulations!!! Have a great day!!"
We thanked them, then finished hiking back.

The rest of the day was spent driving all around town telling people the good news.

We're getting married December 17th, and I'm leaning heavily towards the Draper temple.

Side view of the ring

Lilies and a rose from the bouquet

An Eventful Week of Sorts

This week went "interesting" on Tuesday... I was at work and it started raining. Hard. I was delighted, because I absolutely LOVE the rain. In between deliveries, running in and out the door, was the BEST! I would get rained on and I loved the feel of the water splashing my face. However, this turned out to not be as great of a thing as I thought it was. The streets were full of water, and my boyfriend's basement flooded.

I asked him if there was any way I could help, & he asked me to call him after I got off of work to see where they were at then. When I called, things were in a muddled confusion. Background noise + Andrew being distracted = not much made sense, other than the fact they were leaving to go get ANOTHER shop vac. I volunteered towels & a fan, and we decided he would call/text me to let me know when they were back so I could head over.

After borrowing 2 towels from Terry, my roommate's boyfriend, I grabbed all of my towels I own (3) and hopped in my car. I decided to stop by D.I. in case I could find more towels. Turns out they were closing when I got there, so it didn't happen. Still waiting for him to text or call me, I went over to the park close to his apartment. I feel useless doing nothing when I know there's something going on I could be helping with, so I decided I'd go swing to help get rid of some of my nervous energy.

As I got closer to the swings, I noticed that something was sitting on top of it. When I got fairly close, I noticed it was an owl, staring straight at me. Now, the best comparison I could think of on what sound it was making was like those ghosts with the lamps in Zelda, Orcharina of Time (I used to play when I was younger). I backed up, deciding to just watch it. I'd never seen an owl in real life before, so I sat on the park bench and just watched it. I think it was unsure what to think about me, because it started rocking its body and swirling its head. Maybe this was supposed to be intimidating? It looked like a cute little dance to me. I heard a similar noise coming from the other park bench, so I turned. There were perched two more owls, the same size as the one on the swingset. (which was about one foot tall, at the most. They were TINY).

After a while, I left. My boyfriend texted me saying they were good and to go tutor. So I did. By the end of the quiz I was falling asleep & drove home.

That was JUST Tuesday.

The next day I went to the temple to meet up with Andrew so we could do baptisms together. On the way there it was raining,which I loved. I got pulled into a different group doing family names, and he ended up having the work he was doing go longer, so we never met up. When I got out of the temple, I turned my phone on & the texts started coming in. I got a few in total, but Andrew sent the most... Having never met up with him, he had apparently still tried meeting up & thought something had happened to me. I made sure he knew I was fine, then found out his basement flooded AGAIN. I changed & went over to help. That was also Viva's birthday, which of course I forgot about :P

Thursday I went to go tutor, only to find that they had a U-Haul truck there, and they were in the middle of moving. I helped them pack, recruited Andrew, & we got to work. Around 10 Andrew left, & half an hour later, things died down. With nothing to do I headed home & went to bed.

Friday my car stalled during work, my mom came to save me, then Andrew came to help (we were going to go on a hike, but he ended up coming over to help me help my mom move)... I drove the van home from Salt Lake with the kids so my mom could drive the U-Haul truck. It was an interesting day. I started crashing super early.

Saturday I went to the temple with Andrew, then we went & did a service project. Then we tried finding a place to fix my car. Turns out everywhere is closed until Monday... So Andrew's dad will help me fix it then.

Now, this next part, I'm not sure how many people really read my blog... But I guess here's a minor heads up. That I debated about not mentioning until later, but it adds to the craziness of the week.

Then, Andrew & I went shopping... for a ring. 5 stores later, I never want to go into another jewelry store for a ring again in my life. EVER. I am so done. I met his mom. She took the news better than we thought. Andrew gets to talk to my dad tonight (since it's now 1 AM...)... This could be interesting.

By the way, this is still completely unofficial... I mean, he hasn't even asked me to marry him yet (though apparently he already knows where when & how... - I'm guessing August 10th when I'm taking the day off to go to Lagoon with him... But I may very well be wrong.) But yes. Very unofficial. I could still say no... ;)

Memorable Pizza Deliveries

I currently work at a pizza place, as a "delivery expert". This entails for some interesting stories.

I was taking a delivery to a hotel room, and when I arrived I knocked on the door. It didn't take long for them to answer, but when they did, a large, hairy, shirtless man opened the door. Now, something weird about me. I have 4 brothers and I ran cross country, but shirtless guys still make me automatically look away. It makes me feel a teeny bit awkward. So here, filling the doorway, was this shirtless man in all his hairy, large splendor. I delivered his pizza, managed a smile, and waited for him to sign the receipt (and hopefully give me a good tip). He finished signing it, WINKED at me, and then went in his room. The tip was 40 CENTS. He WINKED at me and tipped me 40 CENTS?!? Did he think I was enjoying his shirtlessness as a tip?! I focused on brushing it off as I went back to my car so I could keep a cheery disposition for the other people I delivered to.

Another delivery, I went up to the apartment door. I knocked, and a guy answered (his shirt was on, thank goodness). A girl was on his couch, so I could only assume this was a date. I gave him his food, thanked him for the tip, and began walking away. "Hey!" I turned around. "Do you drink?" I had honestly never thought ANYONE would ask me this. "No." "Oh, ok. Cuz if you did, I was going to invite you to a party tonight." Now, here's my thought. He may have been hitting on me because I'm pretty & wanted to see me at this party, but I was pretty sure that girl in there was his girlfriend, or at least his date. It doesn't seem like very good date etiquette to hit on other girls while your date is within hearing distance. "No, thank you. Have a wonderful evening." "Alright, you too!" It was kind of satisfactory inside how easy that was to turn down.

On another delivery, the door opened to a firm faced man swaying. It looked like he was going to fall over. I could only assume he was drunk. He didn't seem to be the happy drunk kind, though. He seemed slightly angry. I was pretty intimidated. I gave him his pizza, hoping to make this exchange as quick as possible. When he gave me the money, I turned to go. "Wait." I turned. "What about change?" Ah, right. I forgot to ask him. This was a common amount for a delivery, and the amount he gave me people usually told me to keep the change. "Oh, sorry. Would you like your change back?" He stared at me, hard, then finally said, "Eh, just keep it," then shut the door. Relieved to have that exchange over, I hurried to my car.

Now, for one of the cuter stories. I got out of the car and was heading for the house when a little girl came around the corner. Looking confused, she told me, "Ma'am, I think you're going to the wrong house. We didn't order pizza." I double checked the address on the pizza. "Well, it's your address on the box..." "What's the address?" I began reading her address from the box when suddenly her parents came out of the house. I walked over to them. "Guess we forgot to consult the little ones before ordering," the dad teased. The little girls were like, "Whaaat?? We ordered pizza???" I left them to figure that one out. :)

On another delivery, I got out of my car. Two middle aged men approached me from the garage, greeting me raucously. I didn't quite catch what they said, but I could tell it was inappropriate. I handed them their pizza, and asked them how they were doing. "Better than you! I'm drunk, and you're at work!" I could not think of a response, so I smiled and told them to have a good day. "You be safe! And don't drink and drive!" Don't worry, random drunk guy. That will never be a problem for me.

There are several other stories, but I thought I'd just share a few :) Hope you got laughs out of these!

Comparing Years

Last year, I went to the Stadium of Fire with my friend Shannon. It was my first time ever going, and it was AMAZING :) I loved it.

This year, I went on a walk to find a good view of the fireworks with Andrew. The view we found was gorgeous!! After the display he asked if I would be ok with him introducing me to people as his girlfriend.

Last year, I had a cupcake for my birthday with 18 candles on it, which that many candles on a cupcake = crazy. They were melting each other left & right!! Some of them were even trick candles. I spent all day with my family, and loved every minute.

This year, I actually somehow didn't get a cake. This is ok, since I was pretty much sugared out already. I started and ended the day with my boyfriend, and spent time with friends & family in between while he was at work. He took me out to dinner, and was kind enough to not tell anyone it was my birthday. Someone else in the restaurant had their birthday that day, & got sang to. My "cake" was fried ice cream.

Last year, I was just turning 18, living at home, & not sure where life was going to take me.

This year, I'm living on my own with my family about to move to South Weber, the furthest away I've ever been from them.

Last year if you had asked me if I was going to be in a relationship one year later, I would have said that I doubted it, but I would have secretly been hoping for it. I would have added that there was absolutely no one that I could see as being even potential for a relationship.

If you were to ask me if I would still be in a relationship one year from now today, I'd tell you I sure hope so. Because the thing about relationships is that there are only two results that can come from them. Marriage or a break up. If you think about it, that's just how it is. It either works or it doesn't. There is no third option.

Last year, I didn't want to be in a singles ward because they seemed slightly intimidating.

This year, I am in a singles ward and enjoy it a lot!

Funny, isn't it, how much can change in just a year?

My Greatest Fear...

I saw a YouTube video today that my mom shared, and it reflected my greatest fear and my greatest hope. It talked about how a journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. It showed a man packing his things and leaving his wife and daughters. Then it rewound and showed him looking at a computer screen, suggesting that he had just come across pornography. The screen split and showed two decisions made in that moment. In one, he shut the laptop and left the room. In the other, he closed the laptop then, pausing, shut the door and opened it again.

Then, the screens continuing to be split, it showed the consequences of that one step. On the left, he was distanced from his wife and kids, and then eventually left them. In the other, he played with his daughters, brought his wife flowers, and played an active role in the home.

My heart ached as I watched this video. In the left I saw, in many ways, my dad. His frequent distance from us growing up, leading to my parents divorce after much abuse. Emotional, physical, verbal... This haunted me. Fear struck me, as again I worried about making sure I choose the right person. I couldn't bear that happening to me. More than falling, that is my greatest fear.

In the right, I saw my greatest hope. Somehow finding a righteous priesthood holder that would love and respect me, play with his children, read them stories, bring me flowers and kiss me and pray with me, and be there for me.

The scariest part about it is, really, the wife had no control over his decision. It's all up to him. Something seemingly so small can become so shattering, depending on the choice made in the moment. 

When I saw this movie it brought back fears that I should have already let go. And all of a sudden, "What if" came to mind. What if I do get married and this happens? Fear is crippling. It makes me unsure of love, doubtful, scared. Which brings back walls that I've been working on breaking down.

I really need to learn how to let go of this fear...

An Unexpected Letter

College students tend to not get letters very often. So when I saw a hand written letter on the small pile of mail for my apartment, I sincerely hoped it was for me. I assumed, by the handwriting and "inform the sender of your new change of address" label, that it was from my Grandma Kathy. However, as I picked it up, it was from my Great Grandparents, the Prindles.

Now, when I was little they were my pen pals during their mission together. If my memory serves me correctly, then they have been on around 6 missions together as a couple, and have gone back around 8 or more generations in their tracking of family genealogy. Both were converts to this church. Several years ago, my Great Grandpa Prindle got Alzheimers Disease. His memory has been deteriorating ever since, as you can imagine.

Last time that I visited him, he was actually VERY good at covering it up. He told us memories he had from his missions, being a teacher, as a parent, and from growing up. He showed us his wood work shed, and things he had worked on. He went through photographs and told us about how he met my great grandmother. He smiled, laughed, joked, and made me feel as loved as they always have.
That's not to say that he didn't have his spacey moments, where he'd say something again, or just trail off and then have to ask us what he was talking about. But everyone has those moments. I was impressed by his keen mind, even while it was deteriorating from Alzheimers.

I opened the letter, kind of surprised to be hearing from them at all. It had been at least a year or more since we last wrote each other. I was definitely slacking in that field in my life. Normally, they don't initiate contact, because they are writing everyone else and can't remember ALL of their children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren.
"Grampa found your letter you wrote us in 2010," Grandma told me, "and told me that I needed to write you back."

I was just so impressed by that line. Here is my great grandfather, with a deteriorating memory, reaching out and blessing the lives of others even with (if not because of) his Alzheimers. My great grandmother would not have just sent that letter. She was certain that they had responded (knowing them, she probably had). But my great grandfather cared enough about the discourses between his family members that he asked her to write me back.

The letter continued to update me, and ask me questions about how I am doing. She then also added that I should email her so she could send me updated letters like she did to all the family, and that she would respond to my emails about once every two weeks at the furthest.

However, even as I think about it, I am just so grateful for the knowledge I have of this gospel. Grateful for having the knowledge that my wonderful, kind, intelligent great grandfather will live again. Not because he has died, but because he lives in a body with a deteriorating mind when he is such a keen, intelligent, wise person. He will live again, with a perfect, sound mind, and knowledge a hundred fold as his memory is restored to him from not only this life, but from before this existence from the other side of the veil.

Learning Digital Art: The Final Touches

So, basically, with MANY friends' help, this:

Became THIS:

Now that I am OFFICIALLY done with my first drawing, I can now start on my second drawing ever on this tablet :)

This Is Me Learning How To Do Digital Art

Then.... I got feedback. And I acted upon it :)

Then.... Ah, even more feedback :) Thank goodness for friends that actually know what they are doing!

This is still a work in progress, but this is BASICALLY where this picture currently stands. I have gotten feedback and am going to work on improving it even more, so this is NOT the final product.

By the way, here are the reference photos I used to kinda get a jist on proportion & all that:

And yet surprisingly, it ends up looking a lot like me. Weird how that happens when I draw... I put a lot of myself into my work without really intentionally meaning to, and so in the end, I'm all but looking at myself.

Aiming For "Best:"

Good, better, best.
Do not rest

Until your good is your better

And your better is your best.

I was reminded of that poem today when I went to church - not saying that I'm on the WRONG track, per se, but everyone can stand room for improvement. Today was one of those days that I got to have a slight reality check & realize some areas that I really need to work on & get back on track on in my life. So, during Sacrament meeting I went over For The Strength of Youth & marked it, read it, and set goals & commitments.

Now, it has been said that sharing your goals helps you keep them. So, here they are:

• Focus on & prioritize giving a full tithe & fast offering
• Pray morning & night daily (I struggle to remember to pray in the mornings)
• Read the scriptures for at least 10 minutes a day.
• Continue Indexing! Try to do a batch a week, possibly.
• Be organized & clean (both with workspace/bedroom, & clean & nice in appearance)
• Cleanliness is close to Godliness
• D&C 90:24

Timed Goals:

1 Week:

• Find another job for during the day
• Have the above listed behaviors put into play
• Limit FB usage so that I am using my time in a more frugal manner.

1 Month:

• Have a figured out budgeting plan & be following it
• Find a source of income for all of my needs (Insurance, Orthodontics, Rent, etc)
• Have a savings plan
• Consider deactivating FB account if you are still struggling with wasting time on it.
• Evaluate goals & adjust if needed.

1 Year:

• Have enough money to return to school.
• Continue evaluating goals & adjusting if needed on a monthly basis.

2 Years:

• Prepare for a mission if you are not pursuing a relationship.

Dating Seminar

For FHE on Monday, my Stake held a dating seminar. It was AMAZING!!! :) The speaker was witty, connective, easy going, and sweet. She also knew her stuff - when she demonstrated, I felt a part of me inside going, "Sheesh. She's SMOOTH! I wish I could do that half as well as she can..." Maybe if I practice...

Basically, what we learned was some key psychology things on guys & girls, how to flirt, how to get a guy to ask for your number, how to turn someone down, and how to make sure we're dating rather than hanging out. We also learned how to seem confident & attractive to the other person, read body language to tell if they are interested or not, how to get out of the "friend zone" and become a gal instead of a pal, and how to not come across in a way that will scare the other person off. They also covered how to get the guy you are interested in to feel like he is competing for & pursuing you (see guy psychology #4 below) rather than you chasing after them.


Without too much elaboration, I think I can safely say that this advice works. As for what I have learned so far, here are the notes I have from the seminar:

Guy Psychology:
1. Men seek out relationships that make them feel trusted and respected.
2. Men develop love through sacrifice.
3. Men are largely logical about their relationships and commitments; thus, they do not commit easily to things they have not invested in over a period of time.
4. Men are driven to succeed, face challenges, compete, and conquer.
5. Men like women who like themselves.
6. Men love to be heroes.
7. Men like being appreciated.
8. Men like femininity.
9. Men like women who have opinions and assert their needs.
10. Men pursue women who are approachable and appear to be available.
11. Good men want sex with a woman who feels good about having sex with them and will wait until marriage.
12. Men need to be needed.
13. Men are repelled by criticism, nagging, and whining.
14. A man experiences anxiety in every conversation a woman initiates until she tells him what she wants him to do.
15. Men bond more through talking about things and doing activities than they do through talking about people, problems, feelings, or ideas.
16. Men adore women who give them love, attention, and affection.
17. Men are often willing to talk openly and honestly when they feel it will help them or another person to do so.

Girl Psychology:
1. Women thrive when they feel safe & secure.
2. Women develop love through sacrifice, but need men to communicate their needs if that sacrifice is to be helpful rather than hurtful and overresponsible.
3. Women often take a man's words very seriously, get excited, assume commitment, and then get hurt when he pulls away due to the added pressure.
4. Women are insecure about their bodies and fear competition from other women.
5. Women are attracted to strength and confidence. (Some women misunderstand this attraction and fall for men that are controlling, manipulative, arrogant & egotistical - make sure you understand the difference!)
6. Women are turned off by men who are too nice.
7. Women often fall in love with friends.
8. Women like to be pursued and to feel wanted.
9. Women enjoy touch, kissing, and affection but feel vulnerable and prone to shame after sexual contact.
10. Women want men who hold off sexually - it makes them feel respected and wanted rather than feeling like an object.
11. Women want immediate relationships, but trust and value slowly progressing relationships.
12. Women long to feel adored.
13. Women are repelled by moping, brooding, and the silent treatment.
14. Women worry - they need to know they are not alone in dealing with the problems of the relationship.
15. Women who don't trust and respect their men fall out of love, especially if there is no communication.
16. Women like gifts, surprises, reasonable spontaneity, and excitement - the extra effort makes them feel special (just make sure you don't try this too early - otherwise you are "too nice" and it turns them off)
17. Women would rather have open and honest communication about misdeeds than to be protected from the truth.

I will not give the best of me to those who don't invest in me.

Also, 8 Be-Effective Facts for dating:
1. Your situation does not define your value.
2. Confidence matters; fake it 'til you make it.
3. You're not failing in dating and relationships; your technique is failing you.
4. The more you practice, the better you get.
5. Faith works.
6. To be successful, you must recognize and invest in what you want.
7. The more deeply you sacrifice, the more deeply you love.
8. If he/she doesn't respond, someone else will.

Swan - Flopping

Basically, this was me today. I have invented a new dive. ;)

Coupon for a Free Tank of Gas!

I usually don't post things like this, but this worked for me, so I thought I'd pass it along.

There is a coupon that you can use (issued by the federal government) and take it to any gas station for a... get this...

FREE TANK OF GAS!!!

I have seen these coupons around, but until recently never took advantage of them. If you have one, use it now before it loses value and it's too late!

Scroll down to see the coupon...

PS. I can't take credit for this. It was an awesome internet fruitcake that I saw in another blog, and I thought I'd share a laugh. The ridiculous thing is that's pretty much  way too close to the truth! :P